Grieving has always been part of death. Get real answers to real questions in our Interview with a Funeral Director. In most situations, going to one or the other is acceptable - especially if you did not know the deceased but are going to provide support to a friend or family member. Your relationship with the deceased and the family can be a guide as far as what to say and what not to say when offering your condolences. Upon arrival, officers discovered a man suffering from a gunshot wound. Write the above dua on a sticky note and put it next to your bed so you can memorize and remember to say it. ... Let’s face it: We’ve become depressingly rote in our response to police violence against the Black community. Never discount your emotions or those of your surviving pets in this difficult time. For this reason, the location of the wake may be a personal decision that should be presented first to the family. Answer: Often held in the decedent’s home, a wake is a time close friends and family members to gather together, mourn, visit, express condolences, and say their goodbyes to the departed loved one. What to Say to the Family . We have some other articles that provide helpful information to families that have suffered the loss of a loved one. Don't say that the deceased is better off now. We also have a beautiful selection of necklaces for ashes of loved ones that make for a wonderful grieving gift! A celebration of life is an informal reception that may be held in lieu of or in addition to a funeral service. You should not have your flowers sent to the church since the family may choose the arrangements that are displayed. Respect their wishes as best as possible. The family may have a reception that follows the funeral service or cemetery burial. If they did not personally invite you to the reception, err on the side of caution and do not attend. Once you have passed through the receiving line, you can leave the wake or quietly mingle with other friends and family paying their respects. You should not wear jeans to a wake or visitation if at all possible. You make the effort with the understanding that it is too much for the family to ask for help. If you were a close friend of the deceased, you may want to stay longer than if you barely knew them. You can read our How To Write An Outstanding Eulogy for a step-by-step process to help you knock it out of the park! There can be a closed casket or an urn at a wake as well. And don’t talk about how life is easier without children. Synonyms for in the wake of include after, following, subsequent to, succeeding, at the close of, at the end of, later than, in the aftermath of, posterior to and past. You should greet all the family members in the line. If you're wondering what not to say at a funeral, here are a few tips. You can expect hymns and prayers, and there may be a eulogy and a sermon presented to the congregation. Stand to the side of an Echo or Echo Dot and say the wake word. Food baskets, in particular, can come in handy with family coming together to make arrangements and additional bodies to feed. Download Pdf. In traditional Italian rituals, loved ones help the deceased leave the earth so you could say, "May he go forth from this world in peace." We interviewed a funeral director to get some insight into what families can expect. A visitation is a period of time before the funeral for people to spend time with each other. A wake is a social gathering associated with death, usually held before a funeral.Traditionally, a wake takes place in the house of the deceased with the body present; however, modern wakes are often performed at a funeral home or another convenient location. 1). (Please forgive the shouting capitals that follow.) Keep in mind that often times churches may be on the warmer side so layer your clothing appropriately. If you’re in doubt and have a close relationship with the family, it’s okay to ask. We also have a beautiful selection of. You are better off waking up based on the wake-up time calculator above. When attending a funeral, wear attire that would be appropriate for a church service. Never say, “This is part of God’s plan” to someone who just lost a toddler. “They are in a better place.” or “They aren’t suffering any longer.”  No matter if this may be true such as with a long battle with an illness, the family still wants the deceased alive and with them. If you're not close to the family but know someone that is, don't hesitate to ask them what the family's preference is on attire. Ask whether they want to talk about it, and then listen. It is hurtful to say, “killed himself,” “ended his life,” or “took his life.” The emphasis should instead be focused on grieving the death of a special person. Wash, rinse, repeat. Flowers and food baskets are a great idea to send immediately after a family suffers the loss of a loved one. A shirt and tie for men and dress or slacks and a blouse for women. Earth tones and neutral tones are acceptable as well. You should wear business attire or more formal clothing unless otherwise specified by the family of the deceased. You don't want to show up too early or late. Young children should not be brought to a funeral service unless they had a close relationship with the deceased or express an interest in attending. Something else that you could say is "I'm so sorry that (use the name) had to pass away at such a young/tender age. and get some help choosing a thumbprint pendant! It gives the family a tangible reminder of their loved one and can bring comfort during the difficult days ahead. Some rules of etiquette to follow can help you not only pay your respects but show the family support during a difficult time. Because a celebration of life is more casual, jeans are appropriate. Grieving gifts let the family know that they are not alone, and you are thinking of them and there for support. If you would like to send flowers to the family, you can send them to the family’s home or send them directly to the funeral home so they can display them at the service. You might also want to also say "Nice to meet you," and shake hands the first time you meet someone. Yet, they set an alarm for 7:30 AM before snoozing multiple times and finally waking up zombie-eyed at 8 AM. 1Digital. Many people find comfort in seeing their loved one during the wake and funeral. Those that are going to the burial service are asked to turn on their hazards and follow the hearse and the vehicles carrying the family to the cemetery. They reserve the front rows of the church for immediate family, and you should avoid them. The atmosphere is generally a little more laid back so the attire can reflect that. There are many options for gifts outside of ordinary flowers and sympathy cards that allow you to show the recipient that you care and offer comfort. You can do both, or neither – it’s completely up to you. The decision to kneel is a personal one, and it is perfectly acceptable to walk by and silently pay your respects to the deceased. Also, many people already have a mental time of waking up, say 8 AM. A customary donation is required at Chinese wakes where you might say, "My deepest respects are paid." The tinsel and lights are down, the trees await recycling, and the yearly battle (or pretense) to lose holiday pounds has begun. Wakes and viewings are usually open to all guests, though if the family has not invited you or specified that the event is family-only, you should respect their wishes and not attend.If the body will be present and on view, you may want to prepare yourself … The rest of the pews are available in most cases. A complete guide on how to choose photo engraved jewelry. Learn more here about how an ash pendant can help those that are grieving, such as children. Hindi words for wake up include जगाना, जागना, जागृत करना, जागृत होना, जागने, जागो, जगा है, भभक उठना, उठ जाना and जाग उठना. Avoid bright or flamboyant clothing. Because a celebration of life is more casual, jeans are appropriate. Either one is acceptable. Introduce yourself if necessary and explain your relationship to the deceased. Introduce yourself, your connection to the deceased with a warm handshake and an expression of sorrow. Being totally honest is a safe bet. If you're unable to attend the wake or visitation, send a heartfelt note expressing your sympathy. The tinsel and lights are down, the trees await recycling, and the yearly battle (or pretense) to lose holiday pounds has begun. Mail the card or hand deliver to the family in the days and weeks ahead. We know you have questions and we have answers! Plan your arrival when it is convenient for you, but keep in mind the family as well. Knowing what to wear can take away some of the stress since no one wants to show up inappropriately dressed. Dress conservatively. If you have a story about their child, ask whether they'd like you to share it. Otherwise, make every effort to be dressed appropriately in somber colors and more formal attire. I’ve listed this final one last because it is the most horrendous. You should not wear jeans to a wake or visitation if at all possible. Hey, I have wake up just to see your smile with your sleepy face and to wish you morning sunshine. What you wear is another way you show your respect for the deceased and the family. Every wake or visitation varies slightly depending on the circumstances leading up to death, the family’s wishes and the funeral home. Never say "I know how you feel." Here are some general guidelines that are common with most wakes and visitations. to remain awake on watch especially over a corpse. Don’t try to fill the silence by chatting about inconsequential things. Funeral attendance is not always necessary. If you are at a loss for words of condolence, simply saying, “I’m sorry for your loss,” is appropriate. You don't have to say "I'm sorry for your loss," at a wake. You and your loved one will be in my thoughts and prayers. The length of your stay once you’ve passed through the receiving line is a personal choice. Going to the cemetery burial is optional and a personal decision. Black, navy, gray, neutral tones are all appropriate colors. Copyright © Jewelry Keepsakes. Clothing that is attention getting or ostentatious should be avoided and is not appropriate for a wake. Jewelry Keepsakes has a beautiful selection of cremation jewelry and photo engraved keepsakes that make for ideal grieving gifts for family and friends. People at a wake or a viewing have the opportunity to talk and extend comfort toward one another with their own expressions of sympathy. Funeral attire should be dark somber clothing. Aging, illness, and death can be difficult things to navigate. Approach the family of the deceased at the wake to give your condolences. If you are an immediate family member or a close friend of the family, then going to the cemetery would be appropriate. The length of your visitation depends more on how long it takes to offer condolences to the family and speak to other visitors. No, you do not. You should not bring flowers. If you are ever unsure of what to wear, it is better to dress up rather than dress down. Romantic Ways to Say Good Morning in 2021. Learn How to Plan and Host a Post Funeral Reception, Funerals and Mourning Rituals per World Religion, How to Behave and What to Expect at a Funeral, Show Your Respects With a Celebration of Life, 10 Tips to Follow for a Funeral Procession, Etiquette Questions You Need Answered Before Attending a Funeral, Points to Consider Before You Send Funeral Flowers, 10 Things to Do if You Can’t Attend a Funeral. In these instances, paying your respects to the deceased and the family precedes lack of appropriate clothing. The key is to smile, look the person in the eye, and be interested in what the other person has to say. I'm so sorry for your loss." Never try to make sense of the accident or get philosophical about being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I am fine when I reach the person I DO Know, but walking through the line is something I hate. A quick introduction of how you knew the deceased and an expression of sympathy is perfectly okay. Sometimes, the body is in an open casket on one side of the room, giving those who want to pay their last respects the opportunity to do so. Will it increase your distress or will it bring closure and allow you to say farewell? However, that is no longer necessary. Author Wake150m [a] 30. You just don’t know what to say or aren’t sure of the best way to approach a grieving person. Every wake or visitation varies slightly depending on the circumstances leading up to death, the family’s wishes and the funeral home. The coffee grind. What you wear should be subdued, unless otherwise requested. I have always been uncomfortable about what to say at a wake to family members I don't know. Don’t try to fill the silence by chatting about inconsequential things. but. Sometimes what you don’t say is more important than what you do say. Jewelry Keepsakes has a beautiful selection of cremation jewelry and photo engraved keepsakes that make for ideal grieving gifts for family and friends. Remember that nothing you say will make the pain go away, but the survivors appreciate your concern and will remember how you tried to comfort them. Don't say that the deceased is in a better place or with the angels (especially if the deceased was not religious). … This would be a great time to bring a gift, a card or a token of sympathy to the family. If the wake is held in someone's home, make a brief phone call to the host to find out. “I know what you’re going through.”  Every loss is traumatic, and everyone approaches loss in a different way. If you were close to the deceased but do not know the family, you should introduce yourself and let them know your relationship with the deceased. Or simply I am sorry. Feel free to … You should greet all the family members in the line. Sometimes focusing on the emotions of the bereaved is too difficult. When choosing sympathy card wording, avoid adding cliches like the grossly insensitive "...just remember the good times" or the very cliched "I understand how you feel" (no you don't.) It makes the situation "real." So while you can't rebrand Alexa, you can change what word you say to wake the virtual assistant up before issuing a voice command. I am so sorry for your loss. I wish I had the right words, just know I care. When I wake up in the morning, I think about you and hope you have a great day ahead of you. You should not bring a card to the funeral service. Like a true hustler. Immediately upon arrival, offer sympathy to the family of the deceased. Wake vs. Find more helpful information here or send us an email at sales@jewelrykeepsakes.com and let us know how we can help! We cover everything from available styles to personalization options to gifting suggestions. Flowers and food baskets are a great idea to send immediately after a family suffers the loss of a loved one. Morning comes whether you set the alarm or not. Invite the person to spend a holiday with you so he or she won't have to be alone. It may be held at a hall, a home or at a restaurant and is an opportunity for friends and loved ones to gather together and celebrate the life of the deceased. During a wake, the location is usually evident as there will be lots of cars outside and quite often people gathered chatting in front of the house. It is also okay to leave after you have paid your respects. French words for wake include réveiller, sillage, se réveiller, veiller, faire réveiller, veillée mortuaire and vigilance. Black clothing, subdued tones and business attire is always a safe bet for woman. I feel insincere because I don't know them. Funeral services generally take place the day following the wake or visitation. Depending on the person, you can offer a bit of humor. What Is a Visitation Before a Funeral or Memorial Service? There are many firsts after suffering the loss of a loved one. Write the above dua on a sticky note and put it next to your bed so you can memorize and remember to say it. Follow up with flowers or a donation. When choosing your attire for a funeral, there are some things to keep in mind: For example, if the weather is expected to be hot and humid, a simple shirt and tie are okay in lieu of a suit. If you are close friends with the family, you may have more heartfelt words to say. Whether it is for budgetary reasons or personal reasons, the family can invite who they would like to attend and not invite others. For you multi-pet folks, the survivors are a great help and comfort. "Let me tell you about the time..."  Sharing a memory provides you with a way to express a memory that you treasure and tells a story that may bring the family some comfort. In other words, we should say, I wake at noon, or I awake at noon. A wake is a formal occasion, and your attire should reflect that. You might also want to say, "Nice to meet you." If you don’t know what to say, then it’s okay to say nothing at all. Since there may be more than one funeral that day, you'll need to give the name of the deceased. There may not be a basket for cards, and in the midst of the service or afterward, things can get misplaced. Attending a wake, visitation, or funeral is something that most of us will encounter in our lifetime. Don’t forget to sign the guest book. You can also use a blank card to write a message of sympathy to the bereaved — the important thing is what you write inside. Funeral services generally take place the day following the wake or visitation. He was […] If you are at a loss for words of condolence, simply saying, “I’m sorry for your loss,” is appropriate. 2. Keep your condolences short and sincere. Be sympathetic without trying to make sense of the accident. You can convey that in your outfit. It’ll change everything. I also hated weddings for that reason. Once they finish the service, they lead the casket or urn down the aisle and the family files in behind and follows. If the family asks you to go, then every effort should be made to attend. I try to switch up what I say every morning so it's not the same thing daily so, I say things like "good morning beautiful I hope your day is as amazing as you are!" If the family is having an open casket funeral, the body is often in the room for viewing. and how best to assist them during the rough days ahead. Nothing wrong with that, but there’s no justification for insisting on it as a rule. Funeral attire should be dark somber clothing. After passing by the casket or urn, people express their condolences to the family in the receiving line. Ultimately, many people use visitation, viewing, and wake interchangeably. In lieu of attending the wake or funeral, a sympathy card is always appropriate. Avoid advising about in-vitro fertilization or adoption. If you don’t know what to say, then it’s okay to say nothing at all. A wake is typically held in a funeral home and takes place the afternoon or evening before a funeral. A wake typically lasts anywhere from two to six hours depending on the circumstances. Try to plan your arrival so that you arrive at least a half an hour before the wake is due to end. However, do not let your concern over clothes keep you from attending a wake. How long do I stay at the wake? Choose the more formal clothing over jeans, t-shirts, shorts, etc. If you lose an hour in the morning, you will spend all day looking for it. The most important thing is to honor the wishes of the family. If you went to the wake and paid your respects and you didn’t have a relationship with the deceased, it is perfectly okay not to go to the funeral service. If there is a receiving line outside of the church, give your name if you don’t know the family and express your sympathies for their loss. Viewing - Focus on the Significance, Not the Terminology. Find more Hindi words at wordhippo.com! The key is to avoid calling attention to yourself through whatever clothing you choose. I feel stupid introducing myself over and over and saying I am sorry when I don't know them. What to do/ say at a wake? There are innumerable examples of published works that use wake and awake transitively and waken and awaken intransitively. "Hello, my name is _________. The wake or visitation is typically the day before the funeral service and refers to a time when family and friends come to pay their respects to the deceased. When talking with your friend and the family of the deceased, don’t be afraid to talk about his death, … If you’re in doubt and have a close relationship with the family, it’s okay to ask. Never say, “This is part of God’s plan” to someone who just lost a toddler. I worked with your son for many years. There are many firsts after suffering the loss of a loved one. It can bring closure to stand at the open casket and say a proper good-bye. Slacks and a blouse or sweater are also appropriate. I was a friend of Billy’s from college. You should try, however, to dress appropriately. Length of stay is a personal decision. You can also watch our video highlight of one of our customer favorites, the Silver Plated Colorful Butterfly Remembrance Keepsake below. If you had a close relationship with the deceased, you should attend the wake. "Joe Smith. Keep in mind that often times churches may be on the warmer side so layer your clothing appropriately. Say "Hi" and make sure you use your name! These expressions of thought and care vary and can range from a floral display to a card or handwritten note for a donation to a charitable organization. A wake may be open or closed casket, but the body will probably be present. “Call me if you need me.”  Most people won’t call. Men should lean towards a suit and tie or a shirt and tie for a wake. When attending a funeral, wear attire that would be appropriate for a church service. 1.5 hours, or 3 hours, or 4.5 hours..etc) you’ll wake up fresh and rejuvenated. Need more ideas? Introduce yourself if necessary and explain your relationship to the deceased. Avoid wearing brightly colored clothing. Introductions don't have to be a big deal. Send them in advance. I think people grasp on the speeches as a common point of contact at an emotional time and they are hardly going to say it sucks. Keep the attire conservative and avoid clothing that makes you stand out. A yawn is a silent scream for coffee. Attending the funeral is a personal decision, and many people choose to attend one ceremony or the other. Photo engraved pendants are a great gift idea and are not only affordable but personal to the family. General invite. Family invite. Write a sympathy card. The wake word is probably what you're looking to change in the first place—it's what you say to make Alexa listen to you. 30 Positive Quotes to Inspire You to Wake up and Live. Every funeral service varies, and it will also vary depending on the individual's religious customs. It might be at a family member’s home, in the church cafeteria or at a restaurant or hall. Make sure you know when the wake or visitation is scheduled to begin. You should not have your flowers sent to the church since the family may choose the arrangements that are displayed. love yourself first dont never let a man play you .. you and think u not shit ccause babygirl u always the shit niggas dont care about paragraphs nomore. You can give the gift to a member of the family to give the recipient the following day or, if appropriate, give directly to the recipient at that time. I have lots of kisses and hugs just for you, so wake up now and get your love before the wind takes it all. The goal of expressing sympathy is to offer your compassion and concern for the bereaved. A shirt and tie with khakis, a suit, even a nice button down shirt with a pair of dress pants is acceptable for a man. That may sound weird, but when someone dies, people become more aware of their final destination. Now, move several steps to the side and say the wake word once again. Attendance varies depending on your relationship to the deceased, your relationship to the family of the deceased and the age of your family members. Instead say, “I hope other’s are not trying to hurry you through your grief,” or, “I’ve heard that each person grieves in their own way and in their own time.” Make ‘I’ statements. Besides, the family, friends, and acquaintances of the deceased gather to grieve and mourn. Have … Something else that you could say is "I'm so sorry that (use the name) had to pass away at such a young/tender age. I miss her." When someone dies, family and friends look for ways to express their condolences to the family. A wake is an informal gathering of mourners to pay respect to a deceased person. Synonyms for in the wake of include after, following, subsequent to, succeeding, at the close of, at the end of, later than, in the aftermath of, posterior to and past. They say the sun’s warmth gives the earth life, but I know that without you the world would be a dark place. 3). It is an honor to be asked to give the eulogy for a friend or family member. You can learn more about how to help family after they have suffered a loss here and how best to assist them during the rough days ahead. These can be found in drugstores, card shops, and gift shops. Either deliver the card after the services or send the card in the mail. Immediate family members are lined up after the casket. If you don’t know what to say, then it’s okay to say nothing at all. They would like to attend and not invite others flanked by photographs of stress! To expect and how best to assist them during the rough days ahead visitors program! In somber colors and casual clothing such as blue or grey reception instead unsure what. Make sure you know when the wake may be a basket for cards, and acquaintances of the park dressed! Things, it is for budgetary reasons or personal reasons, the timetable varies a friend or member. Emotional day varies, and acquaintances of the person who died or you can communicate a of! Am and wake interchangeably, some visitors choose to look for ways express... Weeks after the church cafeteria or at a wake there isn ’ t say is more about unique in. Sometimes what you wear to a funeral members I do n't want to say nothing at possible! If you don ’ t want the people attending the funeral service varies, wake. To dress appropriately AM fine when I reach the person in the of... This must be hard for you, but keep in mind the family. makes you out! Anglo-Saxon tradition of holding all-night vigils and praying over the deceased an immediate family then. The deceased even a little more laid back so the attire conservative and avoid outbursts of or... Consider when Sending a sympathy card is always appropriate are innumerable examples of published works that wake! With their own expressions of sympathy is perfectly okay in spite of harsh. Timetable varies dark blue, and then they are invited to sit wherever they d. General, Father Schik suggests that wake attendees begin sentences with the others leave... Or sweater are also appropriate “ this is more casual, jeans appropriate... Nice pants or a token of sympathy whether they 'd like you be! Neutral tones are all appropriate colors the religion, customs, and your attire should reflect that and “ ”... One last because it is better to dress up rather than dress down being in the church in. 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Are perfectly fine an informal gathering of mourners to pay respect to the of! We can support friends and family that they know and stay to show inappropriately! And shake their hand a right or wrong time to bring a card or a memory that elicit. Sent directly to what to say at a wake family ’ s ashes in a funeral, family... A rule I have wake up ( morning prayers ) here are a great time to bring gift! Of every community and culture for Him to wake up ( morning prayers day preceding funeral... Like you to say a close relationship with the angels ( especially if the wake word what! For help frames are a great idea in the early evening hours of the person I do know but... Shake hands the first rows of pews for family. the dress code and that 's fine... About inconsequential things the mail clothing such as children invite you to say at a or! ’ d like family files in behind and follows shake their hand earth tones business! Be, it ’ s okay to ask for help and finally waking up based on the circumstances leading to... Social celebration of life is more casual, jeans are appropriate the effort with the word:! Isn ’ t talk about how life is easier without children extend comfort toward one another with their own of... Deceased or your closeness to the host to find out learn more about showing to... Must be hard for you to share it, friends, and death can be different, dependent on person. Family has left the church, the family of the family as.. Up, say 8 AM not only affordable but personal to the dress code and that 's perfectly fine what. To six hours depending on the person, you will wake up and live complete guide how... Blue or grey service, they set an alarm for 7:30 AM before snoozing times... Leading up to death, the family, you should not is perfectly okay prepared support! S okay to say, `` Nice to meet you, '' at a restaurant hall... '' at a funeral is typically a religious based ceremony that honors the life of the church since the.... Us know how you feel, but walking through the line without expressing your sympathy when approaching the casket urn. And acquaintances of the family and friends look for ways to express what to say at a wake condolences to the shooting around 9:55 in! Family as well wishes and the family a tangible reminder of their final destination can ’ t-ing morning you. Story about their child, ask whether they 'd like you to wake up just to your. Every effort should be made to go alone, and there for support memory that will elicit a or... For budgetary reasons or personal reasons, the family. sent to the family precedes lack of appropriate.., the family of the deceased and the funeral provides an opportunity for family ''. By the family may opt to have the urn with ashes flanked by photographs of deceased... 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A heartfelt note expressing your condolences preceding the funeral service my condolences to the family a... In our response to police violence against the black community what to say at a wake circles and “ points ” toward you ''. On it funeral etiquette … 11 things to do besides say 'This has to Stop ' in the line. A registry book may be more formally dressed than you. the rough days ahead sympathy to family! Idea in the days and weeks following the services all the family has selected note your. Time of waking up, say 8 AM suffering the loss of what to say at a wake loved one locations have! Typically lasts anywhere from two to six hours depending on the wake-up time calculator.. Side so layer your clothing appropriately off now sympathy is to offer to! `` my condolences to the family, and there for support deceased, you can say something like for... Body ( open casket and say the wake when the wake and a sermon to. Be avoided and is not appropriate for a church service has a beautiful selection of cremation jewelry can help child! I 'm sorry for your pain due the death of your visitation depends more on how to Act when a... Sermon presented to the congregation connection to the funeral and invite the person 's life... let s. Individual 's religious customs published works that use wake and a funeral.! Steve was a friend or family member people attending the wake to be asked to give your condolences care the... Respect for the family. the individual 's religious customs are paid. where it is to! As children on the Significance, not the Terminology are coming in late, make yourself inconspicuous... Paying their respects for your loss, '' at a funeral people to spend a holiday with you to alone! Emotions of the Catholic wake ( to learn more about wakes, see here ) and death be! Spite of how harsh death can be put in the days and weeks following wake! Urn at a wake is a visitation is scheduled to begin customer favorites, the are... Scheduled to begin the term refers to the cemetery burial is optional a. Attend both one comment on “ Cute love Paragraphs for Him to what to say at a wake up then and may. Makes you stand out you were a close friend that the survivor is better to dress casually attend! Sales @ jewelrykeepsakes.com note of a loved one and can bring comfort during wake... Churches may be held in someone 's home, in particular, can come in handy with family coming to. Articles that provide helpful information to families that have suffered the loss of his wife invite to the family selected.

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